You don't get large muscles without putting strain on them. Same with

your character.

Becoming a Dad can be one of the most rewarding things that happens to

a man. But the true gift in having children is not the pleasure

derived in being around joyful children. It is the change that occurs

to you as a person as you are tried and tested on a daily basis.

Essentially, every bit of selfishness needs to be driven from you as a

Father or you will be constantly upset and feeling ripped off. Indeed,

it is a choice that most men have to make at some point whether they

lay down what they are focussed on and provide what their child needs,

or press on regardless and ignore the child's needs or desires.

It may not end in disaster if you decide to remain as you were 'pre

kids', but you will certainly miss out on the wonderful character

building experience that comes no other way than by going through the

grind of loving your children every day.