In the past I have thought about the question and come up with a
stunning realization... that essentially I just want my life to be
easier. That somehow, if I performed better as a husband, my wife
would be more helpful, my children would be more compliant, and my
friends would admire the order I had in my home life.
The problem with this line of thinking is that I would unthinkingly
use methods that were ultimately unhealthy in order to achieve the
outcome I so desired.
Or, if I was putting in the hard yards to be a better husband, and I
didn't perceive change in my wife's behavior, I would become
frustrated and throw in the towel.
Somehow we need to, as men, decide to perfect the art of being a
husband because it is the right thing to do. Not because life will be
easier. Not because it will cause our wives to change. Not because we
will receive praise from our peers. But just because it's the right
thing to do.